today's service was great. God's beginning to do smth in me.

during the altar call, i could just feel the Spirit within me, like nudging me forward. not forcefully, but gently. when i went forward for ministry, God started reminding me of some of the visions He had shown me, and tt i had promised to do. but sometimes, its just so much, too diff, too heavy and time-consuming, and all at the same time. not tt i've given up, but i've almost forgotten abt it. one vision in particular, i haven't done anth abt it yet. its not smth i could do by myself, but evryone i approached whom i thot might have been interested, and leaders in 2 diff churches, all gave me a variety of reasons y not. i noe. ive alr forseen the diff and problems. i noe how ppl, in fact almost evryone, would feel abt this. but of all the ppl i asked, i was looking for 3 others, but couldnt find one.

and so i saw the vision again tdy. i dun think i want to share abt here, but u can ask me if u want to noe. i saw it, with further clarification. but i still dun noe.

so ltr, during cell, we were watching ps kong hee's sermon frm last yr's emerge conference. spiritual hunger. i think im losing it. im finding and getting it back again. slowly

ltr on, shaun lee prayed for me. praying for me to put my words into action. it sort of struck a chord, but even so, this vision is definitely long term. or at least i think so. im not going to limit God's timing.

i think it was rly encouraging during worship, especially the second segment, where i saw alot of my cell members, just entering into God's presence and engaging. i can understand its abit diff cos of time, but still, they managed it. more of this in the future?

oh yah, and nxt sat is chma! our band is horrible, the rest of the bands are horrible, most of the singers are horrible. i think i'll just leave after the opening dance item. y do u need a keyboard in hotel calif anw? ridiculous.